This is where my thoughts go.....You're reading my mind!

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Thursday, July 28, 2011

Intoxicated

 How do you ever know when it's love? We get these feelings and wonder. We huff, puff, twist, turn...everything. But we don't know. Maybe we do, but as humans, we seek to see to believe. Could that be why we don't know what we have till it's gone?
BUT I AM...
Speechless. Speechless, that's how you make me feel. Sat by the entrance of my house, I succumbed to the voice of a legend. It was calling me. It whispered something to me. Telling me to come. Come far, far away. Into a world of perfection. The clear, cloudless day time sky passing through my eyes and into my soul. Filling my soul with a blueness. Yet, I wasn't sad. I could feel the blue. It spread through my body like the breeze on a bright day in London. I have always been inspired by music. The music inspires me. It defines me. It triggers my thoughts. The music, the music is me.



And this piece of music gently filled my soul with the words my mouth could not speak. What is this feeling? It doesn't hurt. Neither does it bother. It is a sense of peace. A sense of comfort. It pats my heart with the softness of a child's palm. It cleanses my soul until I feel as white as a dove. What could this feeling be? I just can't place it.

It is not a bother, like I said. Yet the branch of the fir tree gently knocks on the window of my heart, bidding me speak. But I am speechless. And that is how this feeling makes me feel. Now, I speak gibberish. How can a feeling make me feel?

See, this is what it does. What this feeling does.

Something tells me love, something tells me hope, something tells me truth. But I refuse to listen. My strong head, like the bark of a tree, twists from left to right, and back to left. I say no. I must find this feeling myself.
Why so strong headed, a voice in my head asks. I don't know, I say out loud. Then I realise I am speaking to myself. I look around me. Thank you God, I say, no soul is nigh.

MAKE ME BETTER


My head begins to work tirelessly. It thinks, it ponders, it wonders. What are you, you wretched feeling?
I begin to think about the changes in my life. The way I turn the key, the way I twist the knob. It's changed. It reflects a happiness. A happiness whose root I know not.

The way I place the tray in the oven. The way I touch the fudge brownie. I touch with love. A love whose root I know not.
The way I brush my hair to the side. The way I moisten my skin. I touch myself with glee. A glee whose root I know not.
My smile. The way I smile is changed. I smile a smile so permanent, it resembles that cloud in the sky. The cloud that represents us. Stability. Youth. Agility. Companionship.

Because this cloud is not one cloud. It is one thing from yonder, joined with another. And that is us. Birds of different feathers, a-come together. We stay together. Till we are one.
That is how you make me feel.
Like one.
You make me. I am human. Because of you.
And this feeling. This feeling I feel is because of you.
I feel because I know you.
I know you because you live within me. What is a woman who doesn't know her body?
You live within me because I let you.
I let you because I love you.
I love you.
And that is why I am speechless.
My love for you mutes me. It mutes me because if I say a word, that word may spoil the moment.
This moment. A moment I want to last forever. A moment in time. A moment that stands the test of time.

Your love
Intoxicates me.
Afrigator